Seeing the Truth of You

There have been many distorted views or bastardizations I have seen of what I am going to explain about “seeing the truth of you.”

Some have been something like…

“I must be in my truth.”

“This is just who I am.”

“I must be true to myself.”

It is not that these phrases are wrong or bad within themselves however, how I have heard them used in ways to justify one’s rude, unkind, or even spiteful behavior.

Now you may say, “well Stacie, who are you to judge? Maybe what you think is rude is because you do not like it directed at you. Maybe they really are in their truth.” And you would be absolutely right. It is not my place to judge. These are simply my observations.

Let me explain “seeing the truth of you” and maybe you will be able to distinguish between the two ‘truths.’

Think about how often you meet people, and you can sense (with no explanation) that they are holding something back, not being 100% truthful with you, or something just feels off. You have no reason to feel this way but TO YOU this comes across as if they are insincere, dishonest or someone you are not sure you can trust completely.

You might be thinking right now...”heck I feel some sort of this way around most people” or “I don’t ever fully trust anyone.” And this is because society has become so used to wearing masks, to not letting anyone truly see them, and you know you are holding back therefore you assume everyone else is too.

Now most people not being themselves fully is not with the intention of being deceitful or out of malice - it is really the opposite. People hold back out of FEAR.

• Fear of rejection by others.

• Fear of losing people they love.

• Fear of being VULNERABLE and the risk that comes with vulnerability - the unknown.

You think “there’s no way anyone will fully accept me if they really saw me.” Did you ever stop to think they may also be feeling and thinking all the same things you are?

This state of FEAR and UNTRUTH is why you feel this constant unexplainable pressure, discomfort, and unease in your life - YOUR BEING. These sensations get stronger and more intense as you go through personal growth.

You feel like you want to claw your way out of the itchy skin you are wearing but have no idea what will happen if you do - so you stay right where you are - in your discomfort, in your FEARS.

So, instead of hyper-focusing on all the possible things that could go wrong and assuming it will be catastrophic (like I seem to be doing a lot lately), let’s first understand and imagine what “being in truth” is.

Being in YOUR TRUTH = putting YOURSELF FIRST.

Now you may be thinking “wait a minute doesn’t that sound selfish or much like what you described before?” Bear with me a few more moments and I will explain.

YOURSELF FIRST is…

• Your behavior is one from a place of LOVE (not malice).

• You allow others to fully SEE YOU (not deceitful).

• You communicate with integrity, honesty, and respect (not unkind).

• Your actions are because you love yourself, have self-respect, and know your worth that you want to share the purity of you with others - this is being genuine, kind, respectful, honest, and IN YOUR TRUTH.

These behaviors of YOURSELF FIRST are giving others the opportunity to see YOU in all your beauty. Others are no longer trying to determine if you are sketchy, holding something back, or if they need to be suspicious of you because they are SEEING YOU IN YOUR TRUTH and they know it.

Can you see the difference between the two truths now?

Now I would be remiss if I did not explain that this process of peeling away and letting your old ways of being go - well quite honestly it can suck. It can feel like you are dying (literally I thought I was having a heart attack the other night - I was actually grieving). New experiences and letting go can be very uncomfortable.

Why is this?! Well it is because you are holding so tight to your current reality (i.e.

relationships, activities, etc.) and you want certainty before letting go.

You want to know with certainty…

• What will happen?

• Which friends/family will stay, grow, or leave?

• What will these relationships look like if they still exist?

• What will your life look like after you surrender and lean into this complete unknown - because you have never been this person before.

Your mind is going to race trying to grasp onto ANYTHING it thinks it can in its way of keeping you safe - but that is only an illusion. If your mind was keeping you safe, you would not be feeling discomfort, uneasy, and even having diseases start popping up in your life.

There is ONE, only one certainty in life and that is EVERYTHING CHANGES.

So you have two choices:

1. You can grow and be in the flow of your changes and the changes of those around you.

2. Or you can resist and become more sick, more tired, more uncomfortable in your own skin - all to keep what your mind is telling you is certainty.

Choosing to step into the unknown, to allow others to see you in your truth is the willingness to accept whatever outcome happens. It is acceptance and the willingness to let your current reality change. This does mean some relationships may come to the natural end of their cycle. Some relationships may be like “I like seeing you” so they choose to grow as well.

Some relationships you will look at each other and realize you have always been on your truth with one another.

Recently I was presented with TWO questions:

1. “How badly do I want to be 100% healthy in a permanent and comprehensive way, from 1-10?” Of course, I said 10.

2. Then I was asked, "How willing am I to let go of my current construct and let my reality to completely change from 1-10?” This one I was not as enthusiastic about, so I said “8.”

Then I came to realize that in my letting go, in my vulnerability, in my allowing you to see me in my truth, even as I grow and feel like I am stumbling my way through it - that this is the ULTIMATE ACT OF LOVE.

I love myself enough to allow the old me and my old ways to die.

I love and respect you enough to let you grow and accept in your growth with the understanding that within your growth your journey may not include me.

What a beautiful world this would be if we all truly were able to see the truth in one another?

How FREEING for everyone it would be to no longer wear masks, you would know where you stand, you would feel wellbeing in every aspect of you, and the love and respect for one another would grow exponentially.

YOUR TIME IS NOW. 

What will you choose…your current unease or walk out onto the glass bridge of growth, step into the unknown, and allow others to see the truth of you?